


Two Truths and A Lie

by IhaveAbadfeelingAboutThis



Series: Pray Boldly [3]
Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Sexual Tension, drinking game
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:34:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22707826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IhaveAbadfeelingAboutThis/pseuds/IhaveAbadfeelingAboutThis
Summary: Theseus and Gellert meet for the first time in an abandoned pub. Naturally, Theseus suggests that the best way to size each other up is by playing a Muggle drinking game.“A drinking game?”“Yes, you know, where if you –““I know what a drinking game is, Theseus.”Theseus lifted an eyebrow."Good to know. Gellert."
Relationships: Albus Dumbledore/Gellert Grindelwald (past), Albus Dumbledore/Theseus Scamander, Gellert Grindelwald/Theseus Scamander (pre-slash)
Series: Pray Boldly [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1629496
Comments: 8
Kudos: 12





	Two Truths and A Lie

**Author's Note:**

> I struggled with whether to label this _unresolved_ sexual tension, since that would be accurate to this particular one shot - but if labeling is chiefly a way of helping people find the fics they want and avoid the ones they don't, then this note I think is better.  
> Because while this appears to be a one-off, it exists as part of an open-ended series featuring these same characters in this same universe - and the first two fics in the series take place in this story's future... and in both of those fics it is demonstrated that any sexual tension has been decidedly - and repeatedly - resolved. 
> 
> So... if you don't want your sexual tension resolved, just read this one. And if you do... then you have a couple of options for reading these characters... resolving it. ;)
> 
> And for my friends and readers who might be worried about the time that I am spending on this series - I assure you that Grindeldore is still my OTP, and there is plenty of Grindeldore in the pipeline. In the meantime... These guys have been just the imaginary friends I've needed over the past couple of weeks.

**February - May 1913**

Albus had waited a couple of years to date other men. They had all looked like Gellert, which was – flattering, maybe? That Albus still wasn’t over him? Gellert wouldn’t go so far as to call it _gratifying_. After all, Albus was his husband. He wasn’t supposed to get over Gellert. He wasn’t supposed to be seeing anyone else at all. Thankfully, none of them had been right for Albus in any other way, so they had never been around for long.

For everyone’s sake, it was probably best that his awareness of these _other men_ was mediated through friends he had tasked with keeping him informed, and with scaring off dangerously wrong men when necessary. Gellert couldn’t do it himself because he couldn’t return to Britain. Not that he wanted to. He might be bound to Albus, but that was a magical burden, nothing more. Gellert was not still _interested_ in Albus. He wasn’t. He just – Albus could be a little stupid about men, and Gellert might be exposed in one way or another if Albus chose to trust the wrong person. And if pressed, he might admit that he didn’t want Albus to be hurt, either. But that was all. 

This illusion of relative indifference was shattered by Theseus Scamander. He didn’t look like Gellert at all. And he was bright, magically powerful… he treated Albus well. He was a good match for Albus – the first person who might replace Gellert in Albus’ heart, and Gellert hated him. He wanted to kill him. Torture then kill him, maybe. And that was after just four months of the two being together. It drove Gellert around the bend when Albus _married_ him. It shouldn’t have been possible. The blood pact should have made any attempt at handfasting - or even most lesser magical bonds - impossible.

Learning about this young Auror had forced Gellert to admit that he wasn’t indifferent to Albus’ happiness, but neither was Albus’ happiness enough for him. Gellert wanted Albus to be happy _with him_. The day that he received the news that the handfasting had been successful, he destroyed an entire block of St. Petersburg. It was final – Albus was no longer his, would never be his. Magic didn’t even recognize his marriage to Albus anymore. How had that happened?

When Gellert received Scamander’s first owl, more than two years after Albus took on this _second husband_ , it occurred to him that this could be his opportunity to get the interloper out of the way. Albus would never forgive him, but that would be no change from the status quo, so why should that be a deterrent?

But if Gellert had a weakness, it was curiosity, and there were two questions to be answered: who was Theseus Scamander, really? (which really meant, why did Albus want him more than he wanted Gellert?) – and – what was his reason for wanting to meet Gellert? Perhaps _Theseus_ wanted to kill _him_ – perhaps the jealousy was mutual. In which case, he could kill him in a fair duel - that would be a satisfying conclusion to the business.

Negotiations took ten weeks altogether, neither trusting the other. After seven weeks it was agreed that Gellert and Scamander would meet in a pub in Britain, and that Gellert could be the one to choose which pub for them to rent out for the evening, and when.

Gellert hadn’t been to Britain since the day after… well. It was enough to say it had been a long time. It had taken several owls and one Patronus each from Albus and his Auror to convince Gellert to return.

‘I can’t return to Britain. I was tried in my absence – I will be immediately sent to Azkaban.’  
‘You are a master of self-transfiguration – you can look like anyone. How would anyone know it was you?’  
‘Don’t treat me like a fool. Surely Albus is powerful enough by now that he could ward the entire coastline of Britain against my return if he wanted to. He could just as easily cast a targeted latent Revelio to return me to my natural appearance the moment I crossed the border.’  
‘Albus and I worked together to clear your name. Almost three years ago already.’

Was that true? If so, it was interesting that Scamander had chosen to withhold that information before seeing if Gellert would fold after the Transfiguration argument.  
‘Not possible.’  
‘They know Ariana was an Obscurial, it was ruled self-defence. In any case, Albus confessed that it could have been either of you.’

This was a surprise. Gellert enlisted a friend to research the truth of that claim, and they discovered that it had been the law in Britain since 1877 that the corpses of all Magical persons, as well as the corpses of all Muggles known or suspected to have been killed by magical causes, be put under a permanent stasis charm, in order to make future investigations possible in the face of new evidence. Scamander had insisted that Kendra be exhumed, and the telltale marks of an Obscurus attack were found on her.

‘Why did you bother?’  
‘It wasn’t fair. To be honest, I had to press Albus for a year to re-examine his perspective on the circumstances surrounding your departure, but he has finally accepted that he was wrong about a lot of things. Taking the next step - making things right, publicly and legally - he needed to do that for himself and for you, both. It is also the case that I made our marriage contingent upon him doing so.’

That had been the man’s longest response to date. He wondered if it was true that Theseus was the one who had advocated for him. Husbandly solidarity? That seemed unlikely. It was much more likely that he was trying to build rapport with Gellert by taking credit for a decision Albus had made himself. Then again, Albus had always been stubborn. Difficult to tell what the truth was.

Gellert didn’t reply for a month. The variables were too many, and he needed time to recalibrate.  
Apparently, Theseus did not have the patience to wait. Exactly one moon cycle had passed when a luminescent German Shepherd bounded into Gellert’s kitchen.  
‘Make up your fucking mind. This offer is time limited.’  
When Gellert still didn’t reply, he was visited by something he hadn’t seen in years – Albus’ Phoenix Patronus. He wondered if he was hallucinating, until the incorporeal bird started speaking in Albus' voice:  
‘Please give Theseus a chance. I miss you. I would like to see you again, but I will not do that until you have met with Theseus.’

This caused Gellert to consider that it was possible that Albus had in fact forgiven him. But Albus’ new husband was an Auror, and that gave him pause. Yes, he had used his position to gather the evidence that had gotten Gellert a new trial – but that did not mean that his motivations were in any way altruistic. Not all Aurors were hex-happy. Some played a long game, and if this Wizard had been able to keep Albus interested all these years, he was sure to be the long game type.

But Gellert liked a challenge.

Two days later, he replied, ‘The Evening Star in Godric’s Hollow. 5 May. 8 o’clock pm’  
That would give them three weeks to hammer out the remaining details, and it was a new moon, which felt appropriate. Aunt Bathilda had mentioned two years ago that the Evening Star had closed, and had confirmed a month ago that it still stood empty. Asking permission would not be necessary.

**5 May 1913**

The Evening Star. How many pints had Gellert knocked back in this Muggle pub during that too short summer? There was a table somewhere in this pub that he had carved the Deathly Hallows symbol into, to Albus’ dismay (‘defacing someone else’s property, Gellert!’), but Gellert didn’t look for it – only made sure that the table he had selected was not the one that he and Albus had been sitting at that evening. The evening Albus had first said ‘I love you.’ 

With a single sweep of his old wand, all of the other tables were pushed against the walls of the pub, including, presumably, his and Albus' table. The chairs Gellert banished to the cellar - all but two. With these alterations, the Evening Star looked less like the pub he had known and more like a stage set.

He wondered if he had made the right decision to meet in Godric’s Hollow. On the one hand, he couldn’t afford to get sentimental tonight – he needed his mind unclouded. On the other hand, it seemed an effective way of communicating to his rival that they both knew that Gellert had known Albus first, had fucked Albus first, had been married to Albus first.

The Evening Star had been closed long enough that the neighbourhood kids had removed whatever alcohol had been left. Gellert brought three bottles of wine with him, assuming the reason that Scamander had suggested a pub was because there would be alcohol. When the man showed up, just a minute after Gellert had finished rearranging the furniture, he was holding a bottle of vodka, so it seemed that he had guessed correctly.

Gellert stood by the table and waited. And waited. The Auror made a show of scanning the pub. The contract they had negotiated made such precautions seem excessive. Finally the man appeared to be satisfied, and he stepped closer.  
"Grindelwald."  
"Scamander."  
They stood there beside their chairs sizing one another up.  
"Well, let's not stand all evening," the Auror said after a minute or two. He sat and gestured to Gellert to do the same.

Once they were both seated, the man continued.  
“What do you want to know about me, then, Grindelwald?”  
As if Gellert had been the one to call the meeting.  
“What makes you think I want to know anything about you?” Gellert answered.

Theseus smiled indulgently, the way he might have done if a young child had been telling him a story about winged rabbits.  
“You’re here. You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t hope to gain something. From me, since I am the person you are here to meet.”  
“Ah. But that is not at all the same as wanting to know something about you.”  
“No? It is at least a subset of the question. You want to know how to get what you want out of me. Which is to say, how best to manipulate me - what pressure points I have, and so on. What else your curiosity has fixed on, I can only begin to guess.”  
“Please go ahead – I’d love to hear more assumptions, Auror Scamander.”  
“Not yet.”

Theseus summoned two shot glasses from behind the bar, opened the bottle of vodka, and poured himself a shot. When he moved to pour some for Gellert, Gellert moved the glass away and transfigured it into a wine glass.

“Oh? Not interested, old man?”  
Gellert rolled his eyes. Old man? He was 31!  
But he simply answered, “No, not interested,” continuing, “Here’s what does interest me – I’d like to know what Albus sees in you - an Auror, seven years younger than he is. A former _student_ of his.”  
‘Now, Mr. Scamander,’ Gellert thought to himself, ‘let’s see how you parry a thrust that is clumsy and predictable.’  
“How’s the balance of power in your relationship, would you say? How long do you think you have before your _husband_ tires of you?”

“Are you jealous, Grindelwald? Because if I’m the one living with him, that’s entirely on you.”  
It seemed to Gellert that it was, on the contrary, entirely on _Albus_ – who had chosen his family over Gellert, and who had chosen staying in England over leaving with Gellert as planned.  
“ _Yes_ , I’m jealous!”  
Gellert stopped suddenly. He would never have said that on purpose.

“What did you do to me?”  
“What do you mean?”  
Gellert growled in frustration. “You know what I mean! I just answered that question –“  
“Honestly?”  
“Yes!” 

That last ‘question’ had called for some other answer than ‘yes’ - there had been at least… eight better answers he could think of at the moment. Answers that would deflect, answers that would have set Scamander off balance, answers that would not have taken away Gellert’s power so completely. But no - Theseus had asked if what had annoyed him was being made to answer questions honestly - and Gellert had simply answered, ‘yes.’

Gellert gestured wildly. “You see what I mean?”  
“Yes. I see exactly what you mean,” Theseus said in a level tone, as if answering the question, ‘Is there an onion in the pantry?’

Gellert decided that he was sorry that they had sworn to a 36 hour truce - causing bodily harm to this jarvey-fucker sounded - was cathartic the word? How long would he have to torture him before it became cathartic, Gellert wondered.  
Given that he couldn’t so much as dislocate Scamander’s toes one by one (that would have been perfect!), there was only one way to release himself from this indignity.

Gellert picked up his bottles of wine and stood. “We’re done.”  
Theseus stood too. “Wait, no. I hadn’t meant for this to happen so soon, I - Let me explain? Please?”  
Gellert sighed. What to do? He could walk out the door, but then he would be giving up a unique opportunity to pry into this young man’s mind. And now the pathetic Auror was begging Gellert. Begging was good. All it had taken was the threat of leaving.

He could leave any time he wanted. And perhaps another threat later would lead to more begging, and some concessions. Best to not overuse it, but… perhaps one more time before he had to make good on his threat. The critical thing was to finally threaten, let Theseus beg, and then leave anyway. That would be a good end to the evening.  
With that settled, he sat back down. The other man waited a bit before sitting down himself, as if waiting for Gellert to change his mind.

“Explain.”  
“I – need to get to know you. I want to know what Albus sees in you, too. Not in a – I really want to see you like he does, and –“  
“Why?”  
“He misses you. And maybe if we can see each other the way he sees each of us, then –“

Gellert waited. It was pretty clear now where this was going, but he wasn’t going to make it easy for the kid.

“Albus wants you back. But he wants me to stay. He’s – you’re married to him, I’m married to him. He meant it. _Both_ times. Still means it, as it turns out. But the three of us together? That’s never going to work unless you and I are able to at least get along with one another.”  
Gellert didn’t want to share Albus with anybody, but certainly not with this overly sincere Boy Scout. ‘I really want to see you like he does’? ‘Really?' Who used the word ‘really?' 

“And what if I don’t 'mean it' anymore?”  
“Well, yes, any other response would have to be surprising to me, given that you haven’t made any effort these past 14 years.”  
That was unfair, but what could he expect from someone in law enforcement? Amateur moralists.  
Gellert had been making an effort ever since less than a year after he had left. Or - he had kept Albus safe from a distance, at least. There had been no indication that Albus wanted him, so what difference would it have made to ‘make an effort’ beyond that?

“Neither has he.”  
“Yes, you’re a matched pair of stubborn arses. Why I’d want two of you in my life, I can’t begin to say.”  
_Two of you in my life._ Did Theseus - was he actually on board with Albus’ insane suggestion?

“So, you _want_ this? For me to come back to England? To take Albus back?”  
“No. I don’t want any of that. Not yet. But I want to want it. Anyway, Albus thinks that we need you. That he and I are too alike in some ways, and you’d balance us out. I’m not sure I agree, but - ”  
“Maybe he just likes my cock.”  
Theseus laughed, “Maybe.”  
This man was entirely too secure in his sex life with Albus, if that didn’t throw him off. Which gave Gellert far more information than he wanted.

“Personally, I think he wants more than your cock. Or your mouth, for that matter. You really are perfect for him, you know? _If_ the things he says about you are true. Or you could be perfect, if you would try to work out problems as they arise, instead of just running away.”  
‘Just running away.’ What sort of problems could Theseus and Albus possibly have had to work through? Certainly nothing on the level of ‘sorry I killed your sister.’  
But Gellert was not going to give Theseus the satisfaction of arguing that point. Instead… What _should_ he respond to?

“You seem completely unbothered by the notion of me fucking your husband.”  
Theseus started slowly spinning his still full shot glass.  
“I’m not unbothered. Not yet, anyway. I definitely don’t want you to have sex with him if you don’t mean to stay. If it doesn’t mean something more than some nostalgic fling to you. I won’t have you hurting Albus like that. But I think that I can live with it if you are as good for him as he thinks you are. And if you are willing to be his husband.”  
“I am _already_ his husband!”  
“Nominally. Husbands generally live in the same country for longer than the first two weeks of their marriage, so – forgive me if that’s not enough for me to recognize your claim. And given that magic doesn’t seem to recognize it either, at the moment…”

Gellert felt as if he had taken a blow to the jaw - he was completely off balance. What the fuck? 

He had been asking himself the same question for the past couple of years - was it possible for a blood pact to - become invalid somehow? Now Theseus was throwing the answer in his face - obviously it was possible. Albus had married someone else, which meant that their blood pact was, at the very least, flawed to the point of being invalid for the time being, if not forever.

But to complicate matters - Theseus was bringing news that Albus himself still honored the pact - regardless of its lack of magical validity - that he wanted Gellert back…  
Without saying why, exactly, Albus had sent the _other_ man that he had married to tell Gellert all this and to negotiate in his stead.

Gellert was going to need that shot of vodka after all. He silently changed the wine glass back to its original form, filled it with vodka, and threw it back.  
Did he want this? He had often stayed awake at night revisiting everything he’d hoped for when he was 16… none of those dreams had gone away. Having Albus in his bed every night, strategizing with him every day, changing the world together.  
Changing the world. Together.  
Together _with Albus_. 

Never once had he imagined sharing his life with anyone other than Albus.  
And yet somehow, Albus had had no problem imagining sharing his life with this - this bloody Auror. More than imagining.

He leaned back and gestured dismissively with his empty glass. “Am I his husband? Am I not his husband? Either way, I have other obligations."  
Theseus pulled out a thick folder.  
“I know all about those _other obligations_. More like a dangerous hobby, but call it what you will.”

Ah. This was what he had been waiting for. The threats and accusations. But – had Theseus stolen that file? Surely that wasn’t supposed to leave the Ministry.  
“That’s - my file?“  
“Hmm. No, this is not your file. But it is a file that is ostensibly about you. Given that it is in my hands now, I would say that it is my file.”  
Gellert’s jaw tightened.  
“But if what you are asking is whether this folder was taken from the records room at the Department of Magical Law Enforcement before I left work this afternoon… then the answer is also no.”  
Theseus looked down at the file and opened it. Slowly flipping through the papers, he continued, “That sort of thing might be noticed. You know, it is generally thought that danger comes to the ministry from the outside," Theseus paused to flick his eyes up towards Gellert's face, "from people such as yourself…"  
Theseus looked back down, flipped another page, and added almost idly, "So little is done to protect the Ministry from itself.”

Theseus continued his charade of ‘reading’ through the folder. Gellert waited impatiently for them to move on to the next step in this familiar - and frankly boring - dance.  
After several minutes, Thesesus looked up.  
“You do know how this ends for you, right?”  
“No,” said Gellert, lazily. “Tell me.”  
It seemed Theseus must be a standard issue Auror after all. This pantomime was all too familiar - aside from the intimation that Theseus was overthrowing the Ministry. But even that could be accounted for as an almost creative twist on the familiar ‘the interrogator is really on your side’ deception. 

“There are four possibilities.”  
“Four? It must be my lucky day. Most Aurors only give me two.”  
“Most Aurors are idiots.”  
Gellert laughed in spite of knowing that he was meant to.  
“Your little hobby will end one of four ways: life imprisonment, death – whether by execution or assassination, an unending global war that is still raging at the end of your long and miserable life...  
“Or, there is of course that long-shot fourth possibility – total world domination, with you as the supreme ruler of the entire planet. Because anything less than ‘winning’ entirely would get you hauled up on war crimes charges.”

“Who’s to say I can’t do it? Take over governing the world?”  
“Who’s to say you’ll want the job if you manage to get it? Global rule, that fourth scenario, the 1% chance… that doesn’t prevent any of the other three things from happening. If coups never happened, there wouldn’t be a word for them. _This does not end well for you, Grindelwald._ And I give it less than five years before you are so committed to this course that you are on that it will be too late to turn back.  
“At the moment, you are just a suspect in a number of crimes across Europe. And there are plenty of others no one knows about, because Albus cares about you, so I have been covering them up. But at some point, you are going to have to do something that will make it impossible to keep you out of prison, even if you change your mind and want to turn back. There’s a point at which you become stuck, where you have no choice in the matter anymore – where your only way out of a long term imprisonment is to win, even if winning is impossible.”

 _No_ one. Had _ever_. Spoken like this to Gellert before.  
Not a follower, not a peer, not a family member… not an Auror.  
The thought bubbled up: ‘No one except for Albus.’  
Gellert pushed that thought down. The important data here was that Theseus was not afraid of Gellert. No surprise there - that was just another standard-issue Auror communication strategy.  
But he was openly disdainful of Gellert’s current plans - not on the basis of ideology (which had gone completely unmentioned, strangely), but _on the basis of strategy alone_. ‘You are going to die old and alone in a ruined world, with everything you thought you wanted.’ This was not the threat of an Auror to a criminal. This was - fascinating.

The arse waved his wand over the folder, and it shrank and flew into a hidden pocket on the inside of his jacket. “I can make this all go away. Every bit of it. No trace. But in another year or two? By then, it might be too big of a mess for even me to clean up.”  
Gellert rolled his eyes. _Even me._ The arrogant cunt.

“What price are you willing to pay to win?”

Gellert was curious what his unconscious mind thought this question meant, and what it would answer. But the compulsion to speak, the automatic answer, hadn’t arisen. Which reminded Gellert that Theseus had never finished explaining about the forced honesty. Whatever Theseus had done, it was only affecting certain questions, just –

“Did you apply a magic spell to this space?’  
“Yes,” Theseus said with a broad smile.  
Arse. He couldn’t have been more patronizing if he had patted Gellert on the head for a job well done in figuring out the effects of the spell.

“So, the spell compels a person to tell the truth, but only when answering yes or no questions?”  
“Yes.”  
“I can lie at any other time, and so can you?”  
“Yes.”

It couldn’t have been a potion - their contract specifically forbade administering potions to an unwitting party. Similarly, charms and hexes would have to be applied to the whole space in order not to violate the terms of their contract - and those kinds of spells simply weren’t powerful enough to be sustained over such a large space by a single casting. By anyone but Gellert, since he had the Elder Wand. But Theseus didn’t know that, and Gellert wasn’t interested in tipping his hand, so he hadn’t used the Wand once since landing on the Island.

“Runes.”  
“That wasn’t a question, but yes.”  
“You surrounded this whole building with runes?”  
“Yes, I did.”

“Why?”  
Theseus’ smile became more devious as he poured Gellert another shot. Interesting. Not a Boy Scout. Destroying records, stealing files, trying to persuade a suspected terrorist to fuck his husband, seemingly indifferent (feigning indifference?) to Gellert's politics, warding the space in which they were meeting in a way that just skirted the agreed upon limits… and now this smile. He hadn’t been this attracted to anyone in years. Not since - Albus.  
Fuck. Well. Gellert still couldn’t be certain what Albus saw in Theseus Scamander, but he knew what _he_ saw, and - Fuck.

“Albus thought I should play chess with you. So that we could _satisfy_ ourselves as to each other’s intelligence.”  
Yes. This is exactly the sort of thing he needed Albus’ _husband_ to be saying to him, ten seconds after he realized that he had developed a very inconvenient attraction to said husband of his (ex?) husband.

Gellert couldn’t resist asking. “He used the word, ‘satisfy’?”  
Theseus shook his head and rolled his eyes.  
“Yes, he did. He was probably hoping we’d make eyes at each other over the board.” He paused, as if deciding whether or not to share what he was primed to say next. “The first time Albus and I kissed, it was over a chess board.”  
Gellert laughed. Did Albus seriously have only one move?

“Me too. The idiot. That’s not a sure fire flirting technique, particularly if neither –“  
Gellert broke off. The way Theseus was looking at him was – intense. _Interested._ Fuck, no. Gellert was not ready for things to be going this way.  
Why did this man have to be a redhead, on top of everything else? A redhead, an Auror (and wasn’t it hot that he had been destroying his own department’s records?), mischievous… and undeniably interested. Tall, gorgeous, young - but not too young, and certainly not inexperienced.  
Not to mention the particular appeal of sullying something that belonged to Albus...

“None of that answers my question - why the runes? Why force me into this simplistic, black and white truth telling?”  
“Getting to it. My feeling is that what you can learn about another person while playing chess is pretty limited, and it doesn’t test the kind of intelligence that I am most interested in. So, if you agree, we will be playing a Muggle drinking game instead.”  
“A drinking game.”  
“Yes, you know, where if you –“  
“I know what a drinking game is, Theseus.”

Theseus raised an eyebrow. Fuck. Gellert had just addressed him by his first name. He hadn’t been invited, but still.  
“Good to know. _Gellert_.”  
Theseus enunciated his name so clearly that Gellert could feel Theseus’ tongue striking the roof of his mouth.

Gellert looked down at Theseus’ hands, in order to avoid looking at his face, but that didn’t offer any relief. Theseus’ fingers were long - a pianist’s fingers. Did Theseus play piano, too, Gellert wondered. Of course, playing an instrument was not the only virtue of long fingers, of a strong hand, of… Sweet Merlin. This was not the way this evening was supposed to go.

“This is the game. We take turns. I’ll start. I tell you three facts about me. Two of them are true, one of them is false. Your job then, is to find the lie.”  
“And I do that by asking a yes or no question?”  
“Yes. You choose the statement you think is false, then you ask, ‘Is it true that ____?’ If I answer yes, you drink. If I answer no, I drink.”

Gellert thought about this. He would certainly learn a lot about Theseus – but Theseus would learn a lot about him, too. Although… he was the one choosing the statements.  
“Agreed. But half shots. I want to be able to Apparate home.”  
“Seriously? I imagine you were already planning on staying the night with Bathilda. You only have to be in good enough shape to walk 80 yards and collapse on a sofa.”

No, Gellert did not like Theseus Scamander. He did not like his confidence, his humour, his sass, his attention to detail, his beautiful hair, or his broad shoulders. There was nothing to like, he told himself. Then he tried telling himself that he actually believed that. 

///

After 4 rounds, they had each had enough alcohol that it was actually starting to get interesting. The first couple of rounds had been more about learning that neither of them had tells when intentionally bluffing, which was annoying. Gellert hadn’t ever met someone in law enforcement who was this good at lying. Or he had thought he hadn’t. He was starting to question that, now.

He had also learned various trivialities, such as that the Hufflepuff (honestly, what kind of name was ‘Hufflepuff’?) quidditch team had been undefeated during the four years Theseus had been their keeper, his mother bred hippogriffs, he had visited Japan, and his favourite colour was brown.  
The discussion that had followed that particular revelation had been the surest sign that the alcohol was starting to take effect. Gellert had challenged Theseus’ choice in a way that any observer would have been forced to concede was flirtatious - and Theseus had responded by giving a more than five minute long lecture on the many virtues of brown, which Gellert had actually encouraged with little digs and questions, just to keep Theseus talking. 

Now that it was Theseus’ turn once more, Gellert was curious to see just how far...

“I have killed less than ten people, I do not think there’s any hope that you are going to come back and live with us, and I want to kiss you.”  
That was - a very interesting assortment of possible truths.

Gellert knew that what he was going to peg as the lie was almost certainly true, but it was worth drinking to hear Theseus admit it openly.  
“Is it true that you want to kiss me?”  
Theseus swallowed. “Yes.”  
Gellert leaned back and bit his lip before challenging, “So why don’t you?”  
Theseus laughed. “Slow down, Mr. Grindelwald. I’m going to make you work for it.”

“Make me work for it. That is an effective strategy only if I _want_ to work for it.”  
Theseus’ face was suddenly unreadable.  
“Do you want to kiss me?” he asked.  
“Yes,” Gellert answered, surprising himself not at all. 

Gellert wondered if Theseus was surprised by his answer, or if he had already known. He wondered if he and Theseus were even playing the same game.  
Theseus held Gellert’s gaze for a moment, but then looked down and gestured at his glass. “Drink.” So Gellert did.

“I have not killed anyone, I have tried to break the blood pact, and I don’t expect that I am actually going to see Albus again.”  
Theseus sighed. “Are all three of those lies? Are you trying to get yourself drunk, now?”  
“No and yes. Two lies. It is true that I haven’t killed anyone. Is it a lie that you have killed less than ten people?”  
“Yes. I have killed twelve. Albus only knows about three of them.”  
“What about not having any secrets in a marriage?”  
Theseus’ jaw tightened.  
“Everyone has secrets from everyone.”

Just two hours ago, Gellert would have been reassured by the knowledge that Theseus was not the perfect husband - he would have relished having dirt on him that he could share with Albus, something he could use to tear the two of them apart. But now? Theseus had been growing on him, and Gellert was disappointed in his failure to entrust Albus with his every secret. 

It was not lost on him that you have to start from a position of regard if you are going to be disappointed.

“That Wizard in Prague two years ago, that wasn’t you?”  
Gellert had failed to notice that Theseus had pulled out his file again. He was flipping through it with determination.  
“No.”  
“Moscow?”  
“No.”  
“Cairo?”  
“No, Theseus. I haven’t killed _anyone_. Yet. You might be my first, though. I am finding you increasingly annoying.”

Theseus slid his shot glass around in small circles on the table.  
“Is it true that you have never killed anyone?”  
“Yes. Drink, you fucking arse.”  
Theseus drank.

“I’m sorry – I just –“  
“Wanted to make me a villain? To think that I’m a worse person than you are? Simply because I operate outside the law and you _mostly_ don’t? Do you remember all of them? The dozen people that you killed?”  
“No. No. No. And Yes. Yes, I remember every last one of them.” Theseus answered quietly.  
He said nothing for a little while before adding in an angry whisper, “It _isn’t_ that I wanted you to be worse than me. I just - I didn’t want to be _this much_ worse than you. That’s different. Albus thinks – he doesn’t - ”

Theseus never finished saying what Albus didn’t do. Gellert didn’t ask. The file disappeared back into Theseus’ jacket, and another shot of vodka disappeared into Theseus.  
As the silence stretched on, Gellert found that he was sorry to have pushed Theseus so far. He fought his instinct to take Theseus’ hand. To tell Theseus that killing those people didn’t necessarily make him worse than Gellert. That wouldn’t have helped either of them.  
But if he couldn’t do that, there was something else that he _could_ do.

“Has Albus ever worn women’s underwear for you?”  
“No… What?! Why did you even –“  
“I myself, may or may not be wearing women’s underwear right now, and I am thinking that you would probably like to know for sure.”  
“No – Gellert, what are you –“

Gellert batted his eyelashes in a truly ridiculous manner.  
“Theseus, would you like to know if I am wearing women’s underwear?”  
“Yes.” Theseus started laughing. “Well, fuck. Who knew? Seems I would in fact like to know.”

“I can’t blame you, really.”  
Theseus laughed harder.  
Gellert loved making people laugh - it meant he had control over their emotions, in a way - and it also let their guard down, so that whatever he said, did, or asked next might be received in a better light than it would have been otherwise. It could also distract from whatever had been said before - it could at least partially clear a slate.  
Gellert usually thought of humour as a weapon, but it was simply an all-purpose tool. Using it this way, for Theseus… there was something about the way he looked when he was relaxed, and happy - the way he looked now, laughing at Gellert’s sexy, self-aggrandizing joke… it made Gellert want to tell another one. He wanted to be the one who made Theseus let go for a moment. Maybe not every day for the rest of his life - that would be a grandiose suggestion after having known someone for - how long had it been? Two hours? Three? But - again. He would like to make Theseus look like this - feel like this - again. And again. 

In this moment, Gellert was jealous not of Theseus for having Albus, but of Albus for having Theseus. 

‘You don’t have to be jealous. You can have them both,’ his heart suggested. ‘Theseus has said so already.’  
‘I can think of a couple of ways to make him happy and relaxed,’ his cock added. ‘Albus, too, for that matter.’  
‘Shut up. Both of you.’

“I propose that we make it an option that you can choose whether to drink or to remove an article of clothing.”  
“Seriously? No, Gellert. If I want to know what underwear you are wearing that badly, I can just ask.”  
“I am in fact wearing no underwear at this time.”  
“Is that true?”  
“Yes. Which would make me taking my clothes off that much more interesting. Anyway, we are going to get sloshed if we keep this up. Which might be more dangerous than being naked.”

“I’m not going to sleep with you, either way. I need to know that you are –“  
“I’m not asking you to sleep with me, Theseus. Just because you _see_ my cock, doesn’t mean you have to _touch_ it.”

Theseus sighed and pinched his nose. “You are going to disrobe whether I agree to this or not, aren’t you?”  
Gellert laughed. “Yes, absolutely.”  
“What happened to trying to get drunk?”  
“Oh, this is more fun. And who wants a hangover?”  
Theseus tossed Gellert a vial. “Suit yourself, but – I developed this potion a year ago. Sober-up. Take it sometime between your last drink and going to bed, and you will not have a hangover. Sobers you completely, as if you had never had alcohol, making it perfectly safe to Apparate, and all the rest.”

Gellert looked at the vial. He wondered for a moment whether he should trust Theseus before remembering that he didn’t have to.  
“Are you trying to poison me? Will this really make me sober? Will this do anything other than make me sober?”  
“No and yes. And maybe. It makes Albus’ scalp itch. It hasn’t happened to me or any of our friends. I’m trying to figure out why he gets that side effect. ”

Theseus had created a potion to spare a person a hangover as long as they stayed just this side of passing out. A potioneer… that meant that he was patient, intelligent, meticulous… but this potioneer was also a hard partier. As if Gellert didn’t want him more than was wise already. He was so fucked. May the gods smite him and so spare him whatever was coming next.  
But until such time as he was reduced to a scorch mark on the ground, there was a game to be played, and he would play it, whatever the consequences.

“Brilliant! Now I do not have to choose! I can drink _and_ take off my clothes.”  
Theseus rolled his eyes. “Perfect.”

“I’ve lost track –“ Gellert lied.  
“It’s my turn. I have never bottomed. Ever. I find babies to be useless and frightening. And sometimes I am sorry that I didn’t choose to be a musician instead of an Auror.”  
“The first one. Is it true that you have never bottomed?”  
“Yes. Drink. And take off your waistcoat, I suppose.”

Gellert drank and took off his waistcoat. And his shirt.  
Theseus took a deep breath and held his eyes closed just a little too long. Not unaffected then. Good. As long as Gellert was losing his ability to be rational, Theseus might as well join him in hell.

“How can you have _never_ bottomed? Albus is a switch.”  
“Mostly not. He prefers to bottom, so it hasn’t been a big deal to him.”

It occurred to Gellert that everything he and Albus had done together had been an experiment. Neither of them had really known what they liked yet. Theseus knew more about Albus than Gellert did – and he hated it. He wanted to smash something. He and Albus were supposed to have had more than two months together. Why…?!  
He pushed all of that down. He could get more time with Albus, if he wanted to. There was a lot to give up, but – it was possible. It was possible to get back what he had lost. Who ever got that chance?

“I would not have believed this if it were not for the spell. Never. Never?”  
Theseus laughed. “ _Yes_. Never.”  
“Is it true that you have never bottomed at all ever?” Gellert asked again, laughing himself now.  
Theseus was having a hard time remaining in his chair, he was laughing so hard.  
“Ye - ye - ye -” Theseus took a deep breath, and just as he almost had himself under control, he burst into laughter again.  
Finally, gasping, “Yes, it is true… you... son of a bitch… so… help me… don’t ask me again.” 

It was entirely too early to be in love. He was absolutely not in love with Theseus Scamander. He was just - drunk or something.  
Drunk and aroused by Theseus’ flushed cheeks and broad smile and heavy breathing - by the way Theseus’ eyes kept drifting down to Gellert’s bare chest. 

“And why -” Theseus’ eyes snapped up to Gellert’s face. Gellert smirked and Theseus flushed still more.  
“Why haven’t you _ever_ tried - “  
“I don’t know – maybe I like being in control.”  
Huh. Someone who likes being in control who - plays drinking games? That didn’t entirely line up.

“Do you ever let your guard down?”  
“No.” Theseus looked at Gellert as if challenging him to try to make Theseus say more about that.  
Was it true? Theseus had to think it was true, at least, or he never would have been able to say it.  
Even with Albus?  
So - what was this? In addition to the runes, and choosing the game… there was more. Even here, where it was just the two of them, laughing and drinking, starting to build rapport, Theseus was doing something to stay in control… what was it? 

“Never letting your guard down… that’s not healthy, Love.”

Love. He had only ever called Albus ‘Love.’  
Theseus raised an eyebrow. Fuck. He had spotted that Gellert hadn’t called him that in jest.  
Gellert could not afford to feel this strongly about someone he had just met.  
‘You felt this strongly about Albus in just as short a time,’ his heart commented.

Albus might be right about the two of them needing Gellert. Albus liked being in control too. He might not have even noticed -

“You said that you could make all the things in your folder disappear.”  
“Yes.”  
“And then what? There are changes that need to be made in order to keep the Witches and Wizards safe, and I am not interested in mouldering away in some boarding school like Albus, just so that I can wake up with him in the morning.”  
‘With him and with you,’ Gellert didn’t say. It was too soon to say. He was not going to make the same mistake twice.

“He isn’t mouldering away. He sees what he is doing as -“  
“As revolutionary? I’m sure he does. But his way of changing things is slow, and terrifically uncertain.”  
Theseus sighed. “I agree.”  
What?!

“Is that true?”  
“Sorry - your question wasn’t clear enough -”  
“Is it true that you think that Albus is unlikely to make a lasting contribution to the welfare of Wizarding people simply by teaching Defence Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts, particularly while Black is the Headmaster?”  
“Yes.”  
“But Albus would disagree with you?”  
“Yes, Albus would disagree with me. Do we need to belabour this point, Gellert?”  
“Yes, if by ‘belabour’ you mean ‘talk about it some more.’”

“What’s less important than whether we think Albus is delusional -”  
“Did you just say the words ‘Albus is delusional’?”  
“Yes.”  
Theseus huffed and one corner of his lip twitched up before he continued, “Shut up, Gellert.”

‘Shut up, Gellert.’  
Theseus’ tone of voice was exasperated - but fond also, as if he had known Gellert for years, as if this was the 200th time he had told him to shut up. Gellert was having a very difficult time removing the goofy grin from his face. ‘Shut up, Gellert.’ How could he get Theseus to say it again?

“Gellert? Were you listening to me at all?”  
“No. I - that is - I wasn’t, if you said something after, ‘Shut up, Gellert.’”  
Theseus rolled his eyes.  
“I wanted you to shut your mouth, not your ears.”

Theseus was giving him so many wonderful openings for flirtatious lines, and he likely had no idea how much he was testing Gellert’s restraint.  
“What I am trying to say, if you would just stop asking yes or no questions -”  
“No, I won’t.”  
“That wasn’t even a question, Arse.”

Gods, he wanted to kiss Theseus. But they had been talking about something? Maybe he should take that sober up potion now. No - wait - now he remembered. Shit. This was a very important conversation. 

“Right, I’m sorry, Love. Continue.”  
Theseus looked at Gellert cautiously, as if he were cataloguing the marks against them: both drunk, both attracted to each other and flirting, one of them half clothed.  
And then, as if cataloguing all of this had been enough, Theseus squared his shoulders and leaned in slightly, looking as he probably did in departmental meetings when he was getting ready to speak.

“Albus doesn’t need for you to be him, Gellert. He doesn’t need for either of us to be him, but since it is your future we are talking about at the moment… Albus knew that you wouldn’t feel fulfilled at Hogwarts, so he and I have sketched out a strategy, but… it would be your life, so - this is just one option. Not the only possibility for you, but the first we have begun to outline.”

“Option?”  
“The British Ministry of Magic could be your puppet in - Albus thinks it could be done in a decade. I work there, and I think that 15-18 years is a more reasonable figure, but it certainly would not take so many as 20. That is, by the end of that time, you could be the shadow ruler of all Wizarding Britain - you wouldn’t get the recognition, but you’d have all the power. You could effect radical change relatively easily, and what you achieved here would certainly ripple outwards. And you could do it non-violently. Mostly legally. With almost no risk.”

‘Non-violently,’ said the man who had killed twelve people. 

“The downside is you don’t get the whole planet, but -”  
“If it can really be done that thoroughly and that quickly, then why hasn’t it been done before?”  
“It probably has. But not recently.”

Ten years ago, ten years had seemed like a long time. But it had been almost fourteen years since he had last seen Albus, and that was yesterday.  
And what had he accomplished doing things his way, in the past ten years? Perhaps he was just on the edge of a revolution - or perhaps he was just on the edge of that endless war Theseus had talked about. When was the last time he had actually stopped to ask what it was he was unleashing?

“And I imagine you have an agenda you’d want me to adhere to.“  
“Well, then I would be the shadow ruler, wouldn’t I? If the shadow ruler was actually just my puppet all along? No. Your country, your agenda. Of course, we would always be available to discuss ideas with you, and we might decline to continue helping you if, for instance, you were to start - wait, no. Listen, we should have this discussion another time. Some time when all three of us are together. I’m starting to risk sounding like I’m speaking for Albus. He and I have different politics and different limits. Not _very_ different, but different enough.”

‘When all three of us are together.’ What would that be like? Gellert was not ready to think about it. Of course being adored by these two men sounded good, but that would also entail having to witness them adoring one another. It was _possible_ that that wouldn’t bother him, but…

“Gellert?”  
Gellert closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The way his name sounded in Theseus’ mouth was dangerous. He raised his eyes and smiled at Theseus.  
“My turn, then, is it?”  
“Yes,” Theseus said decisively, grinning.  
“You are enjoying being forced to say yes or no, are you?”  
“Yes,” Theseus laughed, “although I’m going to have to alter the spell, so that synonyms count. I should be allowed to say ‘absolutely’ sometimes.”  
“No, I think it is best for you to have no options, Mr. I-am-always-in-control.”  
“Oh? You’ve known me for less than three hours and you think you know what I need?”  
They both realized too late what Theseus had done.  
“Yes,” said Gellert quietly, speaking to the floor. Then he looked up at Theseus, who looked a bit dazed. “Yes and no.” 

Theseus looked away from him, and Gellert took the vodka and refilled Theseus’ glass.

“I’ll go see Albus, but I’m making no promises about where that is going to lead.”  
Theseus’ eyes locked on Gellert’s. They sat there staring at one another in silence, until Theseus finally said, “That’s only one.”  
“That wasn’t part of the game,” Gellert answered.  
“Good.”

Thesesus stood abruptly and picked up his bottle of vodka.  
He pulled out his wand for the first time that evening, and pressed the tip of it into Gellert’s bare shoulder.  
“Don’t you _dare_ ‘play chess’ with him until you are dead sure that you are coming back. And staying.” He gave his wand an extra push, and then he disapparated.

Theseus hadn’t even asked if it was true that he was going to go see Albus. Gellert wondered briefly if that was intentional, before concluding that it must have been. Theseus seemed to be impeccably intentional. But why hadn’t he asked?  
And how had he moved so quickly and spoken so crisply and apparated away so cleanly? As if - as if -  
He hadn’t been drunk at all.

Gellert felt for the sober-up potion in the pocket of his trousers. Still there. He rubbed his shoulder - there was a small, round red mark where Theseus had jabbed him with his wand. It was going to leave a comically small bruise. Protective son of a bitch.  
Gellert grinned, and turned to the bar as if there were a conspiratorial barkeep just waiting to hear him say, “This was not the way I would have preferred to have been marked by Theseus Scamander, but I’ll take it.”

He put his clothes back on, vanished the vodka remaining in Theseus’ shot glass, scourgified both glasses, and carried them back to the bar. He was glad that he hadn’t told his Aunt Bathilda that he was coming – he needed some time alone to think.

He thought briefly of finding his and Albus’ old table, of tracing the symbol of the Hallows with a fingertip, but he shook off that thought. He remembered his earlier resolution – no sentimentality – unclouded mind.  
Gellert had allowed his life to stop the day that Ariana was killed. And when he moved on - he hadn’t moved on at all. Not all of him.  
His life now - it was a half life. Not even half. He often felt as if he were sleeping through his life - he rarely recognized what he was doing and why. He would wake up sometimes out of a fog and wonder, ‘How did I get here? Why am I in this city? Was there even a plan?’  
So much of him was stuck reliving those last three weeks with Albus, and that first week without him… there was very little of him that was invested in the now.

Theseus was ruining Gellert’s life, but not in the way Gellert had thought he was. Gellert had hated Theseus largely because he represented Albus’ ability to move forward out of that summer they had spent together. Albus had a present and a future, and it was with Theseus, not Gellert - whereas Gellert had nothing but a past.

Theseus had offered Gellert release, a way forward, and simply having entertained the thought meant that he had to think about what he wanted. Perhaps it was better to say that Theseus was not ruining Gellert’s life as much as he was forcing him to acknowledge that his life was already in ruins.

What game was Gellert playing?  
What prize was he aiming to win?  
What was he willing to pay?  
How he answered these questions would determine which parts of his life would be discarded, and which repurposed. Gellert couldn’t think of a thing that could be salvaged whole. Not after tonight.

Gellert downed the sober up potion and put the vial back in his pocket. He pulled out the Elder Wand and disappeared.

**Author's Note:**

> Gellert will never forget the first time Theseus told him to shut up. And he will never ever admit that fact to anyone but Albus.


End file.
